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Chapter 5

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This chapter begins with Johannes and Yuda waving to tourists from the balcony of their residence. Yuda is wearing a dress with a star pattern and Johannes is wearing a matching shirt that looks quite tacky. The tourists think the display is very much like that of a "stupid couple." Standing on the balcony, Johannes asks Yuda whether she'd like to have tea with him after they finish giving "service" to the tourists. Yuda shakes her head in disgust as they leave the balcony. Johannes asks, "Are you in a bad mood again? What on Earth is the problem?"

Yuda retorts," Problem? Of course it's the shirt you decided to wear!!" She continues,"If we were going to present ourselves, is this what we should have done?. We look like a stupid couple!!."

Johannes returns, "That's because later you avoid me when we are not in public. I wore this so we appear to have a good relationship. Therefore it's okay, right?"

Yuda is bright red with embarrassment as she walks quickly away from public eye. "From now on it is not necessary" she says. "Certainly they will be saying that Johannes-sama and I are a couple, but ...."

Johannes, trying to look cute, interrupts her mid-sentence with, "Yeah, yeah. But I am the devil even though I stopped the war. How could you possibly like me? " (Clearly he is enjoying himself)

Yuda looking very much like a child who doesn't want to admit the truth mumbles, "I don't like you because I hate you."

And Johannes still lighthearted says, "Yes, yes, and when we are together your heart pounds because you hate me (*heart*)". (recall, in the last chapter, "hate" meant "love") Suddenly, Yuda freaks and takes off running. "Crap!!" she thinks as she runs. Her face looks worried and almost sick. Johannes calls after her to wait and then gives chase. All the while, Yuda tells him not to follow her. Suddenly, he has a brilliant idea and stops and runs the other way. Yuda peeks behind to see him running away and then takes off chasing him. "I don't like being near, but being avoided is worse," she thinks. Johannes delighted by the result of his brilliant idea, lifts Yuda high off of her feet like she's a child and says, "This is stupid. Frantically escaping and telling me not to follow only to come and get caught." Yuda looks like the proverbial deer-in-headlight before she reacts. She wildly swings her arms as if to scratch Johannes's face off and then escapes his grasps and runs off to hide behind a pilaster from which she peers from behind to keep an eye on Johannes. She looks shaken and upset like a scared small animal (the mangaka has drawn her with neko mimi to shippo -- cat ears and a tail).

Johannes tells her, "You are like a cat."

"Get used to the situation, already!! Didn't you tell me when we are together, your heart pounds and you can't calm down? No one else makes you agitiated and confused and I'll tell you why!" Yuda is still peeking from behind the pillaster, her eyes wide in anticipation of Johannes's revelation. And then Johannes, with his finger rudely pointing at her, declares, "It's because you love me!!" Yuda gives him the boo-boo-face and leaves from behind the pillaster holding her hand to her chest in relief, much to Johannes's dismay. "Wait a minute. What's with that face?" He asks. "When I pointed out the truth, you were supposed to become cute. Hey ..." he says.

Yuda turns and asks, "But where did that explanation come from?" She continues, "If I love you, then I would want to be near you and understand you I think. In my case, it's the opposite." Johannes counters,

"Well ... It's different for each person."

Yuda then says, "I don't understand what you mean. Well, it's time for me to study. Excuse me." and then she turns to go to her room. Johannes is clueless as to what just happened.

Later, Yuda is in her room. She is supposed to be studying, but instead she is lost in thought.

"Me liking Johannes-sama. I don't get it. But lately when we are together, my heart pounds more and more and I can't look him in the eye." Then she recalls her father and his multiple wive who dote upon him and compete for his attention. Her mind then moves on to a happy couple face-to-face smiling while holding hands. "Just as I thought, If I loved him, I would always want to be together and when we are together, I would be happy. So I'm not ..." her thought trails off.

Later, she is walking in the courtyard when she sees Johannes recieving a briefing from his staff. To her he looks kind with soft long lashes and his face is bathed in warm sunlight. She blushes at the thought of him and thinks "I am ... not. I'm not ..." as she then proceeds to stalk him for the rest of the day, much to Johannes's irritation. Tired of her antics, Johannes leaves a notebook on the floor and tells her, "whatever it is you want to say, write it here and give it to me tomorrow." Yuda rushed to pick up the notebook. Could it be an exchange diary?

Later in her room at her desk, Yuda opens the notebook. "An exchange diary with Johannes!!" She begins to compose her thoughts:

"Dear Johannes,

Early summer's weather ..."

She stops and thinks whether this is the type of letter she should be writing. She wonders what to do because she doesn't want to write something stupid. She then banishes the thought and starts to write. Her two handmaidens look on proudly from just behind the door. They are pleased that their princess is not worried about what to write.

The next morning, Johannes is in his office working. He is startled by his assist who enters to give him the exchange diary. Johannes can't believe that Yuda actually wrote something and his heart beats quickly in anticipation of what she's written. Yuda, ever baffling, has written a long essay titled "About War and Peace" in the diary. The next day, Yuda is pacing her room in anticipation of Johannes's reply. The handmaidens enter to deliver the notebook and Yuda's heart beats fast, too, as she opens the notebook to see what Johannes has written. His response is, "Ok, I'll think about it. By the way, what did you do today?" Yuda is utterly confused. She flips through the pages and shakes the book, pages down, to see if there's more hidden somewhere. She wrote 3 pages and he only wrote 2 lines. She then gets very upset and curls up in a ball and cries on the floor. She then stops, looks at the notebook entry again and remarks to herself that he has neat handwriting. She then begins her response.

The next day, Johannes reads her response. He is blushing with surprise. She writes about how she spends the morning recieving academic lessons and learning to dance and play the guitar. She asks him about his day day too and wishes him well. Johannes is so delighted that he's laughing himself to tears. He replies that his days aren't decided (I think ???). He played the piano for a month and then quit and some other stuff I can't decipher. It must have something to do about fish, because in the next letter, Yuda asks what a "bass" is and writes about a small river in her home country that she's never seen. Johannes replies that a bass is a fish and draws her a picture of one. He then writes that he would take her fishing so she could eat one, but it's going to rain tomorrow. Yuda thinks this is strange. "Face to face we do nothing but fight, but through this diary we have normal conversations." Her next entry begins:

"I thought I detested that we got engaged to stop the war, but lately this discussion we have been having has made me happy. We'll probably end up fighting again, but I wonder why from time to time I feel lonely. I guess I do miss Johna-sama."

She freaks out about what she has just written. "No way! But ..." and then she thinks back to Johannes's declaration ("Because you love me!) "But this is utterly wrong!" she thinks. "Could the painful and nervous feeling be love?" Just then, the wind from the open window catches the paper and the page she has just written flies out the window. As she searches frantically in the hedges for the paper she thinks, "This is bad. If somebody sees this, our fake love will be revealed. I've got to find it quickly! or else the peace will break down!" Johannes comes out and spots her in the hedges. He asks what she is doing. She tells him that it's nothing. She's just trying to find a lost thing. He reminds her that it's going to rain soon, but she insists that she only needs a little more time to search. He asks her why. Yuda's at a loss for words. He reassures her that the radicals have recently calmed down and that even if they are found out (with regards to the notebook) and the public believes the story, if they quit fighting, then they can explain themselves. Yuda returns with, "But! But if things go like that, then what is the meaning of our engagement?" It has started to rain. Johannes beckons her to come inside and takes her by the hand to lead her out of the rain.

Inside, looking out the window, Yuda thinks," If that were the case, then getting engaged to Johannes-sama wasn't necessary. We wouldn't have to pretend to be lovers. So wouldn't it be better to be found out?" She clasps the notebook close to her chest. "That way once again Johannes-sama ..." And then she sees the sheet of paper caught in the bough of a tree.

The rain has cleared and Johannes is out taking a stroll when he spots Yuda trying to climb a tree. He begs her to come down. She is dressed in what appears to be a night gown and is precariously swirling around a branch like it's a high bar . She tells him she can't because things may not necessarily go as he thinks. "At the very least, my father would be angered. And the angry people won't be silient! Even if we stop fighting, our engagement will be annulled (without our involvement in the decision). So ..." she says as she stretches her arms and fingers to reach the sheet of paper. She looks desperate and Johannes looks on, his eyes are wide as if he is being confessed to. Yuda's hand slips and she falling towards the ground. Johannes springs into action and catches her in his arms and they fall to the ground. He puts his hands to her face and holds her gaze close to his and tells her,

"It's all right. When that time comes, I will propose how ever many times until we are allowed to marry again. And if that's no good, I'll kidnap you. So, it's ok." Yuda blushes in his hands. She nods in affirmation and can't stop trembling because of those words. Johannes, then says, "Thank goodness we landed together." He has the sheet of paper in hand which Yuda promptly snatches away. Of course Johannes wants to know what she has written on the paper and she tells him that it's a secret. To end, Yuda narrates,

"I don't know if this feeling is love or hate but it's ok if things stay the same for a little bit longer."

And she takes off running again with Johannes in pursuit. Yuda's heart is pounding, she's blushing furiously, and her are eyes are squeezed shut because she still can't look Johannes in the eye.